Being brought up Irish-Catholic means I was born feeling guilty, so this column came easy. Below are the guilty pleasures I’m not too ashamed to share. I’ll save the more deviant ones for my therapist.
Facebook Stalking
There’s nothing like coming home from a hard day’s work, logging into Facebook and proceeding to stalk everyone. Stalking old childhood friends, friends of friends, people I work with, people I don’t know, celebrities. I can get lost for hours in photo albums and Facebook walls of complete strangers. People whose Facebook profile is not private are a) idiots and b) open game for my stalking. If you’re reading this I probably already stalked you or I’m stalking you right now.
Binge Eating
Every once in a while, when I’m feeling hopeless and out of control, only a specific combination of junk food will do. Kettle chips with Wise sour cream and onion dip, thin crust frozen pizza followed by Hershey Chocolate Crème pie and/or a Cadbury egg. Once this caloric feeding frenzy is over, I feel completely guilty and even more out of control. But it was good while it lasted.
Other favorite food combinations are obscene amounts of Chili’s chips and salsa with a salt rimmed glass of Margarita, Ramen noodles and The Twilight Zone or several slices of Greek pizza followed by a Heath Klondike bar.
Notable Mentions:
Manga porn, 70s & 80s B horror films, 80s hairbands, 90s hip hop, any rendition of The Real Housewives, early Korn, and exclusively wearing hoodies and sweatpants.
I am totally guilty of FB stalking too. There are times when I look up from my computer and I literally feel like I am pulling out of a worm hole. I find myself legitimately wondering how long I’d been sucked in for, minutes? hours? Not good.